It’s obvious that I hate Trump. But to really understand why I hate Trump, it’s so much more than his politics. It’s who he is, the way he acts. I look through the history books and see George H.W. Bush, or Nixon, and I can hate their politics, but I can at least admit that they are competent politicians. They, as Michael Moore once put it, get up early in the morning and figure out new ways to screw the poor. But, then you come to Reagan, “Dubya,” and Trump, and you see that this is what conservative voters really want from a leader: A stupid king.
Which brings me to my main point: While I hate Trump’s politics, what makes me roll my eyes so much is that he acts more like a comic book supervillan’s second henchman than an actual super villain. Was it so much to ask…
That the president know how to read and write at an adult level?
That he can at least know the name of the leader of a country before you threaten to bomb it?
That he…y’know, says neo-nazis are bad?
That he understand that a flag is not sacred?
That he know Puerto Rico and the U.S. Virgin Islands are both part of the United States?
That a president value the first amendment as much as the second?
That a president who touts himself as a salesman actually sell something?
That someone DVR Fox News so the most important person in the civilized world can skip commercials?
That a person not go all the way to another country just to eat hamburgers?
That it isn’t a good thing to kill gay people?
That someone knows more than three adjectives?
That when you carry a bucket of water to a pickup truck, you put it in the bed, not give it to the driver?
That he not have a novelty “Time” magazine cover and pass it off as the real thing?
That he know not to stare directly at the fucking sun?
That looking at his daughter like he wants to fuck her….not be the grossest thing about him?
That he lie about important things instead of….everything?
That he does his job without asking for a “thank you” like some passive-aggressive bellhop?
That if he can say “grab ‘em by the pussy” in a party bus, he not also say “bleeding from her, whatever” on TV?
That whatever he tweets goes through a spell checker?
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